Another disappointment

I was spotting yesterday, and menstrual starts this morning.

Thus, another early miscarriage is confirmed. Erm... may be it's something called chemical pregnancy. Whatever it's named!

I'm frustrated, disappointed, sad......

Though I had been prepared for the worst since we came back from the gyn, still it hurts!

Pregnant???

I have been getting faint positive since 26.11.09 - 2 days before period dues. A total of 4 tests were done every other morning all resulting faint positives.

Aren't you happy for me? After trying for few months, finally, getting a positive (faint positive), hubby and I had been overwhelmed with the news for the past few days.

It is only 2 days past my period due, but since it's been a real nightmare for me having a D&C for the past miscarriage, we decide to visit the gyn earlier, just in case.

However, the visit to the gyn made me worried! Nothing appeared in ultrasound (Ok, we couldn't expect anything for 4 weeks pregnant), no double line showed in the test given in clinic (Ok, since it's still early, second urine may not have enough HCG to trigger the lines).

Thus, a blood test for Beta HCG is required to confirm pregnancy. We return to get the report by noon. The result is 18.8mIU/mL. The gyn seems a bit uncertain about my pregnancy, and I'm appointed to be back a week later (7.12.09).

18.8mIU/mL is really very low. It can't be able to trigger any lines for a 20mIU/mL test (which is suppose to be the most sensitive test in the market). Then how come I could have 4 cheapie tests getting faint positive??? Is it a symptom leading to a miscarriage???

Keeping your finger crossed for me! Pray hard that no more miscarriage.

Spotting at 11 dpo

I'm having some spotting yesterday @ 11dpo. As of today, no more spotting! I have been waking up around 4am everyday for 2 weeks and some cramping on 8dpo - 10dpo.

It's 4 days before period due, so hopefully this is implantation bleeding, not early menstrual!

Keeping my finger crossed!

Basal body temperature charting

Until now, it has been 6 months past D&C. Hubby and I had been trying since 3 months past D&C. No luck though.

Being a desperate wife, I search for tips to get pregnant faster. lol! You know? That's getting more and more people offering my mother in-law on how to get pregnant! One of them suggest to avoid cold drinks and eat "bak foong yun" after menstrual for 7 days. One told me to eat "Eu Yan Sang bak foong yun". And one told me to go for a gyn. *sigh*

Pressure coming from all around!!!

So I bought a basal thermometer and started my charting from the beginning of this cycle. Through charting our basal body temperature (BBT), we could know our body better and recognize our signs of ovulation. BBT is your body temperature at rest (wake up time). BBT before ovulation is at a lower range while BBT stays in the higher range throughout the luteal (post-ovulation) phase until the next cycle begins. BBT stays high if there is a pregnancy.

Hopefully through this charting method I'll conceive soon enough.

Hope of the month gone

It's another hope gone! But still I'm feeling dizzy all the time though the rashes are going off and I still woke up 5am this morning!

Seems like I need to go for the doctor, but what to tell him? I suppose he'll asks me to drink more water and sleep more. No cure! So I decided NOT to visit the doctor, let it be! I blame the weather and the surrounding air, they could simply change from extreme hot air to heavy rain!

What to do? Nothing could do!

Good thing about this hope gone is that I could go for the concert on 12th Sept without too much fear as pregnant women are prone to have high chances of getting A(H1N1). But I'll buy N95 before going for the concert also! Scared to die!!!

Sleepless nights

I had been experiencing sleepless nights starting last week. I could woke up around 4am for nothing! Yup, it's indeed no reason for waking up. I'm not thirsty, no urge for the toilet, not too cold.

After the woke at around 4am, I'm no longer able to go back to sleep. I'll have to stay awake until the daylight shows.

Why???

Skin problem arised again!

Rashes again! This time they appeared at my wrists and hands. I'm feeling annoyed by the itchiness, making me acting like a monkey!

Anyhow, I must wait until I confirm preggy or not before going for the skin specialist for the problem. That means I have to tolerate with the itchiness until end of the month. OMG, it's a hard time for me! I can only use ice cubes for temporary relieve of the itchiness. *pity me*

Time flies... why not now?

Feeling unwell

Starting from the beginning of this week, I'm always stay upstairs spending most of my time in shop SLEEPING!

I'm not the kind of people whom like sleeping that much but my head seems don't allow me to stay up right, lying down somehow makes me feel better.

There are few more symptoms which make me suspect that I'm pregnant but too soon indeed! Not until 27th July that my period due. No no no, I must be thinking too much. But I do hope I'm pregnant.

Okay, I'll wait to see how is it going on - pregnant or not???

Gaining weight!!!

Why am I keep putting on weight without consuming extra food???

The possible reason:

• Genes. An underlying tendency to obesity may be the result of our genes. People who generally have little problem controlling their weight seem to have a precisely tuned appetite.
• Physical inactivity.People who lead a physically active life are less likely to gain weight than those who spend most of their day sitting in front of a computer or TV, or in the car.

The "genes" matters, I can't do anything about it! My mum and grandma are having the same problem too, putting on weight from bottom! No cure!!!

For the second reason, physical inactivity. I'll go jogging early in the morning once the haze issue settled. Inhaling too much haze while jogging wouldn't do you any good, right?

Come again?

I'm having another menses 2 weeks after the first day of last menses! That means 1 week after I cleared the last period, I'm getting another period! OMG!

Why so troublesome one?

Cramping....

Wow, first menses after d&c is much much more painful than previous menses!

This menses comes with a lot of cramping that last for more than 4 days. I've been exhausted by the pain since I refused to take pain killer!

What a miserable menses I'm having? And still it is ON! When is it going to give me a halt?

First month after d&c

It has been a month since the d&c treatment - a nightmare for me. Thanks god, I'm now healthily recovered!

Two months to go before trying to conceive again. I'm counting down again!

Report is out!!!

Hubby and I showed ourselves in the clinic on Monday morning to get the report from doctor.

The report says that:
INTERPRETATION: Endometrial curetting - Products of conception confirmed. Negative for molar tissues.

Yes!!! Negative for molar tissues!!! I'm not carrying any molar pregnancy!

Doctor advised us not to conceive within 3 months. So we will WORK HARD after these 3 months!

Baby no more

Hubby and I went to the doctor in Hospital Fatimah on Monday morning. The doctor got my blood test report and according to him, my H.C.G. rating very high. And it makes the possibility molar pregnancy very high also. After another ultrasound, he made an appointment with me to do d&c on the next day morning.

Then we went to the other doctor in Ipoh Specialist Hospital According to him, the sac for the baby is getting smaller, and the tech said "it's collapsed!". So he recommend an immediate d&c section for me. But when we ask about molar pregnancy, he said the posibility was small.

And so I was admitted to the hospital on 10.30am. Since I've had some food in the morning, I need to wait until 2.00pm for the d&c. Hubby was there with me until 2.00pm, the nurses came to change my clothes and pushed me into the operation room. Not until 2.45pm that the doctor came to start the d&c.

The operation run until 4.00pm. I'm back into the room after that, and the doctor came an hour after. I was so anxious to know whether it was a molar pregnancy, the doctor said it didn't seen as a molar pregnancy since no "grape" thing came out, but we'll have to wait for the biopsy report to know the exact answer.

We went off back to our home on 6.30pm without much pain, but a little dizzy.

I'M STILL WORRYING ABOUT THE MOLAR PREGNANCY! We'll have to wait until the next Monday for the result!!!

Fifty fifty percent pregnancy

I'm backed from another doctor!

Now, relax a bit!!!

I was brought into a room for ultrasound checking by the nurse whom also claim "Irregular!", I then asked to urine to a cup, following by the call into the doctor's room.

After some checking by the doctor, while hubby and my mother in law waiting behind the curtain, the doctor gave an answer which was to my relief not as serious as describe by the previous doctor.

Doctor said I have now fifty fifty on pregnancy as I am bleeding and no fetus heart beat. An injection is given. As I am not working, I am needed to rest more and an appointment is given dated next week.

I asked the doctor, regarding those "grape" pregnancy I was told earlier. Doctor said there has the possibility but only 1% to 2%.

But still, if I miscarriage this time, a d&c need to be done to ensure all remaining is cleared. This is to ensure the coming pregnancy's smoothness.

I hope my baby could be bless surviving in the fifty fifty percent of chance.

Baby's in danger!!!

I woke up at 3.30am this morning, found my underwear is wet with brownish discharge. And when wipe with tissues, show bright red blood!

So hubby and I go to the doctor early in the morning. The doctor see via ultrasound, confirm can still see the small black dot but beside the dot there are something unknown which was swelling and looks like cloud, could be a possible "grape" pregnancy - molar pregnancy. The doctor even call his nurse to invite the doctor opposite their clinic to come over. And the doctor is giving the same idea, but he said he had seen such case which already safely delivered the baby.

But my doctor keep repeating "this is very unusual", "doesn't look good"!!!

I'm really worry. I'm going to consult another doctor later, hopefully I'll hear something good. Wish me luck!

A tiny black dot or may be two?

Hubby and I just went to the doctor for check up.

The doctor scanned my stomach again. Now, this time we can see a tiny black dot located at the middle of my uterus. The doctor scanned for a few times, in one of the scans, the doctor says he sees two dot. Two dot??? That means I'm carrying a twins??? But when he scanned again, it went back to see only one dot!

The doctor said it is still not steady, and it is a bit small for my weeks. He gave me 10 tablets of Utrogestan and told me to continue having Folid Acid.

I'm given another appointment on 18.05.09. Hopefully by that time, my baby will already been staying nicely within my uterus!

I'm pregnant!

Yes, I'm pregnant! I've took the test yesterday, two lines!!!

Hubby and I go to the doctor this morning. The doctor scanned but see nothing. I took another urine test in the clinic, getting a positive result. So we've make an appointment in 10 more days.

Happy April Fool's Day

No good news

No good news for this month....

Let us wait till the next month!

4 days past due

It is now 4 days past my period due, I'm again anxious waiting for the answer. I don't want any more early disappointment, so I won't do the test until a week past my period due.

Hopefully this is going to be a good news for me!

Waiting....

I am still waiting for my baby to come.... but yet no answer! Hopefully my baby is on the way coming.

Happy Valentine's Day

Saturday evening

After having lunch with my friends in McDonald's, I rush back and switch on my computer!

Wow, I manage to grab 3 opportunities to write.

Still I'm wondering whether to quit or stay for my current, I'm not anymore happy working there since I get to know that my boss doesn't think that I'm really doing my jobs well. He thought that I'm doing nothing in the office!

I hurt a lot getting to know that I don't worth a penny in my boss mind!

Happy Chinese New Year

Skin problem solved

I went to see the doctor on Wednesday (once I got my period)!

My skin's now backed to normal, no more rashes! *Cheers*

Problem again

I cannot sleep well for nearly 2 week already! I used to sleep until morning, but now I'm waking up few times in the middle of the night! I can't understand why.

These few days, my skin problem get worst, rashes appeared all around my neck and face. I had to wait till I got my period before I go for a doctor since the doctor's giving me very mild cream if I'm preparing to be pregnant.

So I'll be rushing to the doctor once I get my period!

Happy New Year 2009